Data's Ode to Spot

Felis catus is your taxonomic nomenclature,
An endothermic quadruped, carnivorous by nature;
Your visual, olfactory, and auditory senses
Contribute to your hunting skills and natural defenses.

I find myself intrigued by your subvocal oscillations,
A singular development of cat communications
That obviates your basic hedonistic predilection
For a rhythmic stroking of your fur to demonstrate affection.

A tail is quite essential for your acrobatic talents;
You would not be so agile if you lacked its counterbalance.
And when not being utilized to aid in locomotion,
It often serves to illustrate the state of your emotion.

O Spot, the complex levels of behavior you display
Connote a fairly well-developed cognitive array.
And though you are not sentient, Spot, and do not comprehend,
I nonetheless consider you a true and valued friend.

— Data

#StarTrek #STTNG #humor #tv #scifi

So many persistent and mysterious electronics failures on #SkinwalkerRanch but the cameras shooting the show are reliable as fuck.

#tv #humor

The Secret of Skinwalker Ranch is a great show to watch if you’re into watching people launch rockets and review the video later that night and talk about launching more rockets.

#SkinwalkerRanch #tv #history #humor

“The Bear” was fantastic. But I’ll take a second season before an Emmy.

#tv

Not sure how I feel about the Doctor Who finale.

#tv #humor

Prediction: Copper-Fit Zen Thrust Condoms.

#tv #productidea #humor

“CODA” is the first movie starring a predominantly Deaf cast in leading roles to win Best Picture; Troy Kotsur is the first Deaf male actor to win Best Supporting Actor; and writer-director Siân Heder earned her first-ever Oscar for Best Adapted Screenplay. #tv #movies

If they discover treasure on @CurseOfOak Island it will be a cache of chests filled with ox shoes.

#tv #humor

This needs to be real. Just take my money.

Nestflix

nestflix.fun

#tv #recommendation

Someone needs to show the male on-air talent on #CNN how to tie a proper Windsor knot. These crooked ties have to go.

#pedantry #tv

I love the new TLC show “90 Day Beyoncé” where foreigners have 90 days to “put a ring on it.”

#tv #humor

If you look closely that coffee cup on Game of Thrones was actually from Starkbucks.

#tv #humor

George R. R. Martin wrote: “Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.”

To which I ask “what if you’re an asshole?”

#tv #humor

If you’re trying to sound authoritative and you say “tape” or “taping” when you mean “recording”, you’ve already lost us. No one is recording on tape.

#tv #pedantry

I love fine print. Empire Today offers $50 per extra room when you get flooring. Apparently that excludes materials, pad, and installation. I wonder what it actually includes.

#tv #humor

I’m hearing WAY too much Ramones music in commercials and TV show themes lately. It’s a travesty.

#tv #music #opinion

I wish these political surrogates would just tell us the fact of the matter or the truth or the reality of the situation.

#political #tv #humor

This is Billy the Chantix guy. Be nice to Billy. In a few years he’ll help us defeat aliens.

#tv #humor

Seriously, I think “The Situation” should really have a room on CNN.

#pedantry #tv #humor

Recommendation for Discovery Network: change “Shark Week” to “Shart Week” and watch the ratings go through the roof.

#YOUREWELCOME #tv #humor

Hey CNN you shouldn't return from every single commercial break with a “Breaking News” segue. Repeated conjecture is not breaking news.

#tv #pedantry

You have to love CNN.

#tv #humor

They should combine the reality shows “American Pickers” and “Hoarders”.

#tv #humor

I just found out the hard way that muppets vomit cereal.

#tv #humor